19 Jan How Rebellious Are You?
We each have our own rebellious side and it shows up differently for everyone (PHEW – otherwise we could be in trouble). For the sake of this blog, I will refer to a spiritual rebelliousness expressed through our humanness. If you’re confused by this, I assure you that you will definitely recognize parts of yourself as you keep reading you.
By spiritual rebelliousness, I mean all the intricate behaviours we can come up with in order to not follow guidance we have received or even what we know is right for us.
We rebel by lying to ourselves because deep down, we don’t want to let go of the comfort of what we know even when we know it’s unhealthy for us. An example of this is when we make ourselves believe we can move through deep blockages and negative patterns on our own and thinking we have what it takes to cut through our bullshit. The reality is that if we were able to do that, we would never be stuck in our own gunk.
Rebelliousness is also wanting to prove that we can achieve what we want “our way”, meaning without following the guidance of a mentor, coach, or even the guidance and warning from “our team up above”.
Sometimes we rebel because deep down we are not ready. We think we want something, but a part of us still needs time or is comfortable with how things are.
I share this because 2019 was a spiritually rebellious year for me. Regardless of the guidance I was receiving, the support from people around me and the obviousness of certain situations, I was still moving in a direction that was not what my soul wanted, but my humanness was craving it.
I know, the human me is pretty stubborn!
As you might know, I’ve been working on my self-evolution for quite some time. What I didn’t know going into it was that this path came with its fair share of ups and downs and ugly little – and even big! – truths about myself that I didn’t want to see…
The more I resisted the guidance I was given and resisted learning from my lessons, the harder things got for me. The human me loves to have fun, party and meet with friends and it DOESN’T like when I’m told what to do… no matter where the guidance comes from.
I learnt the hard way that being hard headed does NOT always work to my advantage. When things got really hard, I realized I had to make a change, so I started listening, but the way up was steep.
One of the lessons I learned was to not have hope based on an illusion (which I share more about here), because that is a killer and a waste of time. It’s hard to spot and even harder to accept!
Here’s a perfect example: I was hoping my relationship would lead to something solid and long lasting, but the reality (what I didn’t want to see) is that we didn’t want the same lifestyle.
The moment I let my guidance lead me, I was able to feel and own what I really wanted which is crucial in making a big change. I was open and surrendered to it.
What helped me most is having a mentor and coach. Without that support, I would still be stuck in the downward spiral of denial, obsession, justification and trying to make myself believe the illusion I created.
Being conscious and wanting to evolve doesn’t prevent you from being stuck in the dark side of your humanness. What allowed me to move forward was stepping out of the story I was creating for myself. BUT! For that, I needed guidance. I needed support and I needed my own willingness to let go.
There is no wisdom in being rebellious. It’s an illusion of power.
If you recognize parts of yourself in this blog and genuinely want to make a change, I can help you with that. I have over 10 years experience working with individuals, teaching them how to understand and work with the human part of themselves in order to align with their soul.
If you are ready, open and committed to transforming your life in 2020, there is still time to join my group coaching program Diving Into Your Essence. We start tomorrow, January 22nd.